Operation Skinny Jeans: #nevergiveup

Tuesday, April 8, 2014


I am gonna be real honest. Being a coach is hard. I love talking to people and helping people (even if they don't buy anything) and it is the most fulfilling thing I have ever done.

But it is hard.

I used to be the person who quit. I gave up on my goals when things got tough or inconvenient or didn't go perfectly. I was that person. I can not even tell you how many times I have given up on my self. I literally thought I NEVER would get healthy. That my life was destined to be one of misery and discomfort, stuck in a body that didn't reflect my inner self and feeling lost and depressed.

When I started trying to lose weight last December (for the upteenth time), I expected myself to quit by spring. It was my cycle. I would commit in fall, quit by spring and gain it all back by fall just to start again. Never making progress, further perpetuating the idea that I CANNOT SUCCEED. It was in my blood. Failure for life.

Until December 2012. I started and I refused to stop. I decided right then and there that I was going to do this if it killed me. And it hasn't. And I am doing it. I believe in myself. I KNOW I can do anything I set my mind to. I have proven it time and time again.

But as a coach, I can't control how other people feel about themselves. I KNOW they can do anything they set their minds to, but they don't. I am learning I can only do so much. I can only encourage someone SO MUCH until they have to do it themselves. I can only be the voice in one of your ears telling you that you CAN succeed. And that is hard.

I hate watching people give up on themselves and their goals. This is not easy. In fact- losing weight is the hardest fucking thing I have ever done in my entire life. And some days, I want to quit. But I think about how far I have come, and why I am doing this in the first place, and how DISAPPOINTED I would be down the line if I just gave it all up, and I put down the cookie. I have something to FIGHT FOR. It's ME.

And I can't be the only person fighting for you. You have to fight for yourself.

And that is hard for me. I care so so deeply for other people that when they give up, it crushes me. I am trying not to take it personally, because really its not my fault. But I can't help but feel a sense of loss when someone I care about gives up on their goals.

So I want to impart all of you with this. And I want you to know that I am rooting for you.

You are worth it. #nevergiveup
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  1. Thank you SO much for today, I definitely needed it. SinceSaturday's 5k when I wasn't quite at where I wanted to be, I've felt super discouraged about the whole thing. What's the point of trying if I still look the same and don't feel like I've made any progress? I know ti will take more time but it's just disappointing to not be able to see any success at all.

  2. You're so great! We are all in this journey together, but some people just haven't gotten to the same place yet. I know, because it took me forever to get here!!

  3. I have come to this realization with my mother. It's incredibly incredibly sad, but unless she wants to help herself, there's not much I can do. Unfortunately she's given up and doesn't want to help herself.

  4. This, this, A THOUSAND TIMES THIS.Since putting my journey out there, friends, family, even blog-world strangers ask me for advice all the time. I am SO happy to help (I wouldn't put the offer out there otherwise!) because I didn't have that when I started, and I figured everything out on my own. But it IS frustrating to give literally every piece of advice I've learned along the way, and to hear, in response, the same mistakes/excuses I gave myself for years. I try to remember the same thing you're saying, that I can only do so much, but it's hard to be a support system for someone who isn't being their OWN support system.

    Riding the coattails of another person's motivation only goes so far! If getting skinny was as easy as scrolling through motivational Instagram accounts every morning, we'd all be supermodels. Clearly I have a lot of feelings on the subject, but glad to see I'm not the only one. For what it's worth, the good by far outweighs the bad, and I never want to be one of those unapproachable bloggers who is above helping others and answering questions (even the dumb ones). AND THAT'S OKAY <-- +eleventy million bonus points if you catch my drift :)

  5. I needed to hear this! Like really needed too! Thank you :) You are AMAZING!

  6. As always, your are such an inspiration. Thank you for the uplifting words. I've been having a couple of really off weeks here and I needed to hear something like this. Thank you.

  7. As always, your are such an inspiration. Thank you for the uplifting words. I've been having a couple of really off weeks here and I needed to hear something like this. Thank you.

  8. Kat at http://fitnessrebooted.com/ just posted something the other day that I think everyone needs to hear "There is plenty that I can't do NOW, but I don't believe there is anything I can't do EVENTUALLY"

  9. I have been stuck in this place for about six weeks now..... I wanted to give up a hundred times maybe more. I read somewhere in the last few weeks about motivation. The quote was something like there is no sustainable external motivation. It got me thinking about my own motivation on my journey.... am I sourcing my motivation externally by reading blogs and looking for inspiration? What is it that motivates me? Have I had my true AH HA moment that will help me carry this through? I kept thinking and thinking, and as I thought about it I realized. I had no reason why I was even trying to lose weight. I know I am fat, I know its unhealthy, I know its unattractive... But in my head I kept hearing, but you look good... your hubby still wants you, your active, I walk a couple KM a day, I can do Jillian Micheals Shread, I can run up and down the stairs, I can spend 3 miles on the treadmill doing inclines, I go to yoga.... the list went on and on. I felt like because I was active and I had a husband who still found me attractive and that when I get dolled up to go out I look in the mirror and go "hot mama", that I had no reason to lose weight and I felt and to some degree still feel like I dont. But it hit me... I WANT TO! I want to wear my wedding ring again, I want to sit down and not puddle, I want to be able to cross my legs when I sit ! Those reasons didnt seem like a profound why or an internal motivation to keep me going so I saw them as insignificant. I learned in those quiet moments with myself that they are mine and they are reason enough to keep on going and that the confidence I have and the activity I do is FUEL in this journey and tools to use along the way. I didnt give up. I go to weight watchers and for six weeks I kept going to the meetings and all I heard was charlie brown wha wha wha wha wa wa. Then one meeting suddenly the leaders voice was clear again, and I realized I never gave up !! I can do this. And the point of the novel I just wrote is to say, after reading this its just one more tool to ad to my own arsenal to use when I feel discouraged. I relate to you and am so thankful that you share your personal journey so that people like me can find it within myself.

  10. I had to give up trying to build my holistic health counseling business because I could not separate my own successes/failures from what my clients were experiencing. It's really hard to see someone who is SO CLOSE to success choose to push it away.

    With that said, I agree fully that losing weight, choosing health, choosing to be happy, it's the hardest and best thing that a person can do for themselves. So proud of you for choosing it time and time again!


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